The single most important thing is to have the conversation about end-of-life preferences as early as possible, while your parents or spouse are still of sound mind and body. This gives you the chance to understand their wishes, get legal documents in order like advance directives and powers of attorney, and make a plan before a health crisis hits. If you wait until the last minute, it will be much more stressful and difficult.

It's easy to put off the end-of-life conversation. No one wants to think about their own mortality, let alone a loved one's. But avoiding it can lead to real heartbreak down the road.

Imagine a scenario where your mother suffers a stroke and is left unable to communicate her wishes. If you don't know whether she wanted to be kept on life support, or if she preferred comfort care and hospice, you'll be left making those gut-wrenching decisions on your own. And you may end up choosing the opposite of what she would have wanted.

Even if your parents are currently healthy, it's crucial to have this conversation before a health crisis hits. According to a 2017 study by the Conversation Project, only 32% of adults have actually discussed their end-of-life wishes. That means the vast majority of families are forced to make these decisions in the midst of an emergency, without clear guidance.

The end-of-life conversation should cover a few key areas. First, find out your parents' or spouse's preferences for their final days — do they want to be kept alive at all costs, or would they prefer comfort care and a natural death? Get specifics on things like feeding tubes, ventilators, and CPR.

Next, discuss their wishes for funeral arrangements and body disposition. Many people have strong feelings about things like burial vs. cremation, open-casket vs. closed-casket, and how they want to be memorialized.

Finally, make sure important legal documents are in order. This includes an advance directive (also called a living will) that outlines their medical wishes, as well as a durable power of attorney that names someone to make decisions on their behalf. Without these, your family could end up in a costly, drawn-out legal battle.

The goal is to get a clear, documented understanding of their preferences so you can honor their wishes when the time comes. It's not an easy conversation, but it's one of the most important you'll ever have.

Broaching the subject of death and end-of-life care can feel impossibly awkward. But there are ways to make it a little easier.

First, pick the right time and place. Don't spring it on them during a family gathering. Instead, schedule a quiet, unhurried conversation — maybe over a home-cooked meal. Reassure them that you're not trying to take control, you just want to understand their wishes.

Let them guide the conversation. Ask open-ended questions like "What's most important to you as you think about the end of your life?" or "How would you want to be cared for if you couldn't make decisions for yourself?" Listen more than you talk.

If they get upset or change the subject, don't push. Acknowledge their discomfort and suggest revisiting the topic another time. The goal is to have an ongoing dialogue, not a single uncomfortable sit-down.

Finally, make sure to document everything. Take notes, or better yet, record the conversation (with their permission) so you can refer back to it later. This will prevent any confusion or disagreement down the road.