The Quietest Exit: Why VSED Is the Hardest, Most Necessary Conversation You Aren't Having

Voluntary Stopping of Eating and Drinking is legal, accessible, and entirely misunderstood—and your parent is likely waiting for you to bring it up.

Three weeks ago, an 82-year-old retired architect named Arthur sat his daughter down, poured two cups of black coffee, and told her he was done eating. His mind was as sharp as the T-squares he used to draw with, but his heart was failing and he wanted to control his exit before his body made the choice for him. This process has a dry, formal name—Voluntary Stopping of Eating and Drinking, or VSED—but for families, it is the quietest, most deliberate exit possible.

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